
Friday, March 09, 2007
I'm Hammered!

Tuesday, March 06, 2007
I wan' my baby back, baby back (aligned with my) ribs


snow daze

Wednesday, February 28, 2007
"a picture is worth a thousand turds" (title by crimsoncrow, thanks very much)




Sunday, February 18, 2007
Tuesday, February 13, 2007
Sunday, February 11, 2007
greyhound meet'n'greet



Monday, February 05, 2007
star sign

Aquarius pets are gentle and loving with children and will bark or meow just to hear the sound of their own voices. They are extremely intelligent and unbelievably brained. You need lots of patience when you train them. They do not obey orders easily and the more you push them, the deeper they will put their paws into the ground and refuse to budge. Sometimes these pets don't want to be cuddled or petted, but remain aloof. Aquarius pets are curious and inquisitive and will literally push their noses into everything.
ophelia
Sunday, February 04, 2007
Stardom's Birthday


Thursday, February 01, 2007
Friday, January 26, 2007
seriously, i'm in mint condition

Speaking of “sick like a dog,” my poor puppy tore her dew claw on the car seat two weeks ago. They had to remove the whole thing. She was in a soft cast for a few days, but now its pretty much back to normal. Of course, she has had to adjust to the cold weather. She has to wear her red coat now, and her little boots. She has to go through the suiting-up process even for a by-the-door pee because the ice crust on the snow tears her skin as if it were paper. It has been around 0-10 degrees Fahrenheit in the morning lately and lower with the wind. Walking on the little bit of snow that got sleeted on and then glazed with ice is like breaking hundreds of plates. The old New Englanders (like my grandma) used to say, “As the days start to lengthen, the cold starts to strengthen.” No shit. They are forecasting as low as -20 F for this weekend. Everyone is sick, not just me.
The day I tried to go to work and had to leave was the worst. I ended up on the bathroom floor, tearing through the little first aid kit like a heroin addict. I was tossing shit over my shoulder, looking for anything that would help me in any small way. I had gone through the aspirin a long time ago. All I scored was some ointment for my nose and some electrolyte tablets that I didn’t dare take, in the end.
I listened to a client that I have worked with for a long time while she rehearsed her victim-impact statement (to be read in court the next day). My eyes were running and I had tissue literally shoved in my nose, since it was running like a tap. I was sneezing so hard I needed an adult diaper. The bad news is that I didn’t have one.
Fortunately that client and I know each other quite well, so she didn’t mind seeing me like that. She had actually been taking her dog to the vet when I had Star there for the dew-claw amputation. That’s a small community, for you.
She sat with me while I was on the waiting room floor with my seventy-pound Greyhound in my lap. Poor Starry had her tongue hanging out and she was all wrapped in blankets. The vet kept coming out and checking her heart rate and stuff, waiting for her to come out of the anesthesia enough to get in the car. I was a basket case because my Lucky boy (also a Greyhound) died under anesthesia about a year ago, while he was in recovery from having a tooth extraction. Bad, bad memories. I had tried to leave Star there and go to work, but I started hyperventilating. Fortunately, I work for an agency that runs a 24 hour crisis hotline. I called it. Really.
My colleague was great and commanded I just go back and be with my dog. She cancelled my gigs for me. No matter what we go through or how I bitch about my job sometimes, I am lucky to do this work and know that caliber of person. Or – some other term that isn’t so firearm-oriented.
Anyhoo, the whole day was just really fun. Yet I was very grateful that my dog didn’t die. Then the next week I got sick.
Obviously, going to work with this cold was a big mistake. But the thing moved through its critical period pretty quickly. That was a blessing. And we had a snow day when I was about to try going back to work (and probably shouldn’t have), so that was another blessing. It was Friday, too!
I am at the church and I expect a client within the hour. Of course, I have learned the hard way not to count on callers until they actually show. It is cold out and people tend to get the hibernation mentality if they have a choice about it. So we’ll see.
Then I have to leave in about an hour to go do a set of gigs at a grade-school. They got postponed when the dog got hurt, so I’ll be glad to get in there and have it over with. Tomorrow I’m doing a joint presentation at a local college with sexual assault, the SART (rape kit) nurse, a cop and a victim witness advocate (from the DA Office). And tomorrow, my friends, is FRIDAY!
Let’s see – we need something green. Allow me (actually you don’t have a choice) to quote from The Wisdom of Nature: The Healing Powers and Symbolism of Plants and Animals in the Middle Ages (Werner Telesko, Prestel Press). Because, why? Because, it’s here. Okay:
Menta piperita L. – According to Greek mythology, the nymph Minthe was transformed into mint by Persephone. Various mint species were used in medicines by the Egyptians, Israelites and Romans. The Egyptians and Greeks also added mint to their beer and used it in beauty care. Charlemagne’s Capitulare de villis (795) and the famour plan of the monastery at St. Gallen (around 820) recommended the cultivation of several mint species.
In place of smelling salts, mint is said to have an invigorating effect on someone who has fainted. Mixed in pomegranate wine, it cures hiccups and nausea. The liquid obtained from the whole plant in a distillation flask is described as an effective cure for nose bleeds. Milk does not curdle, so it is said, if a few mint leaves are dropped in it. Peppermint tea is used to treat diseases of the respiratory tract and digestive organs. Peppermint oil or menthol is applied externally as an ointment, balm or liniment to relieve pain.
The text describes mint as hot and dry in the third degree. Small plants with dense foliage are best.
** So, there. I’m thinking I need a shitload of mint.
Stay warm, ljl J
Tuesday, January 09, 2007
my god ate my homework

In my job, I hear a lot of excuses. Unfortunately, for a reason that remains a mystery to me, I spent most of last night with a few really good ones running through my head - grinding like a truck stuck in the mud. Brain mud.
The cool one from yesterday was an abuser who couldn't get to his whatever (restraining order hearing, divorce mediation, assault case, whatever) because he was offshore on a deep-water fishing boat. Although our attorney represents the guy's ex, the guy wanted our lawyer to go in and ask for a continuance.
Hmmm. Let's just pretend for a moment that there is any excuse for getting on a shark boat and heading into international waters when you know you have a court appearance scheduled that week. Pretending this, we can move on into the fake-o-rama smackdown that our attorney and I envisioned after getting that phone call (complete with fake sound effects on each side).
Perp: "Hi, ah...so I need a continuance because...ah...I'm...ah...in the ... ocean." (insert sound effects of waves and gulls - "swoooosh, swooooosh" "squak, squaaaaaaaak!")
Lawyer: "Oh, hi. Yeah. Well...ah...I can't get you a continuance because I'm, erm...I'm....on the moon." (insert rocket noises and strange beeping)
Perp: "What's that? I can't....oh, my god! A giant lobster just raked the boat! (flush toilet into phone)...Sweet Jesus, help us! We need a bigger boat!"
Lawyer: "Sorry, you're breaking up. A giant rocket just went by! (run hairdryer by phone)...Ow! My ears just popped!"
Perp: "Ohmygod, pirates! We're being attacked by pirates! (plays episode of Spongebob loudly in the background).
Lawyer: "Ohmygod, aliens! Sorry...gotta go. There's an alien menace! (plays episode of Battlestar Galactica loudly in the background).
Both make fizzing, swishing, roaring noises into their phones before hanging up.
Friday, January 05, 2007
ToiKoi

Wednesday, January 03, 2007
Thursday, December 28, 2006
speaking symbolically
Here I am at St. Frank’s again, doing my outreach hours. I couldn’t get in here for the past two months or more due to low staffing at our primary office. The time that I was unable to come here, as those who read my blog will have noticed, had a direct effect upon my overall mental health and well-being. My job totally sucked ass. I mean, even more ass than usual.
Coming back here after stress-o-rama gave me some added insight into my own career meanderings. I mean, I come from a clergy family and I earned all the degrees to become a minister. Then I got stalemated by the doctrines and church traditions and blah-blah’s that I would have to sign on for to do ministry.
I did a stint as a hospital chaplain for coursework and that was great. The thing is, you can’t be a hospital chaplain without being funneled through a church system. So here I am backed into a career corner.
The thing I like about chaplaincy (and that even my Baptist supervisor said was my strength) is that chaplaincy demands that the chaplain be open to the faith journey of the patient. It is not a good place for evangelists – anyone rigid about the belief structures they can allow into their brain or tolerate in others. I have the opposite problem – self diagnosed as hyper-fluidity.
So I was good at it and enjoyed it – but my difficulties with ordination power-structures have dead-ended me every time I tried to approach that career path. I ended up in human services – first doing residential care and then the job I have now at the domestic violence place. A lot of the work is similar, but there is a piece missing that I think I bumped into today.
I had the church to myself for a couple of hours and I love that. Call me anti-social, but churches are always best when they’re empty. I love my little office, which is a partially-converted vestment closet. I engage in an ongoing OCD battle with someone from the choir about whether the little St. Frank in the window should be facing out toward the landscape or in toward the room (i.e. closet). I mean, don’t you think St. Francis of Frigging Assisi or what-all would rather look out the window than stare at a closet? They bill him as nature-guy. Right now we have a fragile truce in which Frank is angled so one eye could see out the window and one into the closet/office – provided he wasn’t a frigging block of wood. I have a lot of time on my hands, here.
So on. I was in the sanctuary looking at the statuary. The giant St. Frank on the wall (rosary at hip, foot on the globe) had a bundle of fresh bay leaves tucked under the foot. Someone had clearly gathered it at the beach and stuck it on there.
I have always liked this particular statue – problematic doctrinal symbols set guiltily aside. That’s my fucking problem, by the way. You should see me trying to sing a hymn or do a responsive reading without stalling out to scowl at the intricacies of the text. And don’t tell me to go be a Unitarian. They thought I was too Pagan. Yes, they allegedly allow Pagans but you are apparently supposed to be UU first and Pagan second (actual quote). I am the other way around, thanks very much. Plus the local ones have a vehement hatred of vegetarians. Yep, religion is just that stupid. Hence my preferring a church when its empty.
Okay, back to the thing – the idea that I bumped into. Something about the image of the fresh bay leaves tucked under the foot of that old statue reminded me (or made me realize) why I got into religion in the first place. And being stuck in our central office for all these weeks, sometimes as the only staff there, facing crisis after crisis – ugly mess after ugly mess – it helped me to see how the religious symbols help life to mean something. They give us something pretty and hopeful to hold onto. Even those male-centered, Caucasian/European-heritage-centered and anthropomorphic, middle class, diversity-excluding hymns that drive me up the fucking wall every time.
So – I will try to appreciate what people are holding onto in those hymns, and take comfort in the religious imagery that nourishes me. Yay.
Oooh! Gotta go. I’ve got the church to myself, again. Time to go ogle the solid wall of Poinsettia’s under the organ pipes.
Happy New Year – filled with diversity, empowerment and peace.
pretty thoughts
Well, here we are. We survived Christmas. I am going to Boston tomorrow to do second Christmas with Dad's side of the family. We do that every year and it is good. I wrote some work stuff here, yet deleted it -- too septic even for me to keep. I want to blog on normal, mundane stuff. Pretty thoughts. Yay.
It's good weather for travelling. It is below freezing for once, and there is frost on the ground. Still, we have had almost no Maine winter. We had about four inches of snow in November, but it melted off in forty degree weather the next week. It has been totally bizzare. I'm not complaining. The ski-freaks are, though. I say fly to Aspen if you haven't got anything to do except ski (then insert profanity).
Okay. Gotta go walk the dog. :)
Friday, December 22, 2006
star and flower


my puppy's sister and littermate is up for adoption through http://www.greyhoundplacement.com/ (the exact link to flower is http://search.petfinder.com/petnote/displaypet.cgi?petid=7488586)if anyone has been oh, so jealous. here's her pic so you can see how much starflower (flower) looks like my girl, stardom. (flower is on the left, star is on the right).
speaking of stardom, her pedigree is on http://www.greyhound-data.com/d?d=stardom&sex=f&color=&birthyear=&birthland= (so is starflower, for that matter).
It's cool. It shows her Sire going all the way back to a dog named Pilot in the UK in 1820, and her Dam going back to Kitty in that same period.
:) leslie